I used to live in the country...not many visitors and not many trips out of the house. I lived a quiet life. I was lonely and often depressed. Now I live in an apartment, in town. I don't like it. I don't like the fact that the neighbor across the street is a dealer, I don't like the fact that the neighbor downstairs slams the doors all the time. It's too noisy, I hate listening to ambulances and police sirens all night and the traffic! Oy I live on a brick road!! The traffic noise is terrible. The yelling in the middle of the night from the neighbors fighting...I want my country home back so badly. On top of all this you get involved in peoples dramas, when you live far away no one really thinks about you much because you aren't around them every day but then you move in closer and the drama gets intensified by 100%. I have one friend, I'll call friend a, that is suspected of being an addict and I have never been around a situation like this before so I have no idea what to do or what to think or what to say. My other friend, friend b we shall say..., has known friend a for over 20 years and been through some really intense situations with her and she tells me she is trying to help and friend a says that she is playing me and that I shouldn't trust what she says because she lies, so who the hell do you believe?? I have only known friend a for 3 years and only recently has it gotten to where we hang out and stuff more and friend b and I hardly know each other at all and she doesn't even totally trust me and I don't trust her... UGH! I don't understand....How do people deal with this kind of confusion on a daily basis...and not go crazy?
For awhile I thought I was depressed because I was always alone, but I'm kinda depressed now with all this going on so I'm not sure which is worse, loneliness or social butterfly...
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